Week 1 was all about turning away from distractions (food, noise, tv shows) and expanding quiet time to listen more intently to God’s Word and His voice. Most importantly, I learned to trust in God’s timing.
Week 2 was a disaster – I fell sick. I am still not feeling well. I had to catch up on my work while also covering for my friend who’s on leave. Every day was a physical and mental struggle – at lunchtime I took medication and rested for awhile. After work, I had dinner, took medication and tried to sleep. As I had a lot of medication to take, I had to break my fast and ate 2 meals. The quiet time I had dedicated was replaced by sleep.
Still, I am struggling. But strangely, it is in this struggle that I feel more closely linked to Jesus’ journey to His passion. I had a terrible headache and I just couldn’t be a kind listener in a conversation. I’m sorry to admit that I had no patience at that point. But then I realised – the pain I’m feeling is nothing compared to the pain Jesus felt from the thorns. And yet – Jesus found strength to complete his mission, and he found time to kind to others.
What great love the Lord has for us, that he endured his passion for our sake!
I had also lost for my voice and it was painful to speak. I usually sing praise and worship songs while I work, for an hour or so every day as “Praise Hour”. But this week – I couldn’t sing. My spiritual life felt as dry as my throat was. I longed so much to be able to sing praises but I couldn’t. So instead, I meditated on the words of psalms, even adding my own ‘psalm’ of praise and thanksgiving every now and then. I prayed to my Guardian Angel (or angels) and the choirs of Angels in heaven, to please sing praises to God for me, on my behalf, while I couldn’t sing.
Yesterday, while I was standing in the hall drinking water, I looked up and saw the image of the Divine Mercy at the altar.
And as I looked at the rays shining from the Heart of Mercy, I felt peace – like cool water on my forehead. Lord, be living water for my soul as I seek you. Be healing water for my body that is ill. Be refreshing water in my mind and heart, as I journey towards Easter with you.